Randomness, not From Concentrate

1.

There’s no better way to open a “Random Thoughts” post than with someone KO’ing himself and lookin stupid and such.

2. It snowed 20 inches this past weekend.

20………………………………..INCHES!!!!!!

That’s a whole lotta white crap falling from the sky. It took me 4 hours to dig out not just my driveway, but also the entire back alleyway so I could get my car out onto the main road. Once I finished everything, the neighbor, who conveniently has a snow blower, decided to spend all of three minutes to clear the front sidewalk. Thanks buddy, thanks for that.

3. It’s January in the health clubs, which means everyone riding the short-bus has decided to come and work out for the next five weeks, leaving a trail of anger and frustration for everyone else involved. I have a working theory that all the New Year’s resolution-ers drop off the face of the gym floor as of Valentine’s day each year. So I figured I’d give everyone a quick survivor’s guide to January.

Step One: Shut the hell up. It’s busy, and I know you can’t spend the 90 minutes on the elliptical because there’s a bunch of other people in here, so just deal with it until Valentine’s day. Also, I know the music sucks, but at least it sucks for everybody. No way in hell we’re gonna listen to Bieber’s greatest hits or any crap like that.

Step Two: Pick a different time. Oh what’s that?? You work until five and then want to go to the gym just like everyone else between the hours of 5 and 6? But wait!! It’s crowded in here!! Curse all the people who also work a 9-5 job like I do, and the other 85% of the population. If you don’t like it, pick another time, or get a better job that has some flex in it.

Step Three: Clean up after yourself. I know leaving 10 plates a side on the leg press (which you only did partial knee bends on anyway) id the gym equivalent of showing your buddies the prom queen’s panties after a knock-around, but put your shit away. The 60-year-old granny doesn’t want to do your workout any more than you want to do hers. Also, clean the stuff. A quick wipe-down isn’t out of the question, bub.

Step Four: No Curls in the squat rack. This means you, Gentilcore.

That’s about it. Follow these steps and we’ll make it through this together in one piece.

4. I’ve discovered that I really like eggs lately. I’ve also discovered a fondness of all types of beans. Most of it came after reading some of the nutrition stuff in Tim Ferriss’ new book The 4-Hour Body.

Lindsay, for some odd reason, does not seem to share my enthusiasm for this new eggs and beans dietary modification.

5. Everyone needs a little Red Bull once in a while.