Later this week (on the 17th to be exact), it’s my 35th birthday. I’ve never been a big birthday celebrator, preferring to have a low-key dinner with friends and family, and just going to work if it’s on a work day. I’ve just never been that interested in having everyone’s focus solely on me, which I know is somewhat paradoxical for a guy who’s website is named after him.

I have a small tradition of doing an escalating list blog series around my birthday. This year I wanted to do the same thing, but take a slightly different course of action on it and show some of the things that have shaped my understanding on fitness, working as a trainer, and how to be somewhat successful, all of which didn’t come from the fitness world. I think you’ll really enjoy it.

 

#1. Having to do it yourself helps you understand the process

I grew up in a working class family where it was always better to fix or repair something than buy something new. This meant I spent a lot of time in the garage learning about how cars worked, how to do basic maintenance, and developing a thought process of step by step procedures to get a job done. Most of the work was on my own 1982 Ford Escort (with a shoehorned 1984 Tempo engine) that I paid a guy $50 for, or my dad’s 1976 GMC Olympic Special pickup truck, and now with how computerized cars are I have no idea what to do with them.

I can’t tell you the last time I changed the oil in a car, probably before I sold my Escort, but that time was invaluable to help me understand the process of what it took to change the oil, which helped me to understand the processes required to accomplish anything. There’s always steps to success.

#2. Having money in the bank doesn’t make you happy, but it gives you options

I can remember when I was in university and looking over the money I had until payday. I could do one of two things: buy bus tickets to get to school, or buy groceries. I chose bus tickets and did what I could to stretch my food out for another week. The good thing is Ramen noodles are cheap and somewhat filling, and if you save the flavour pack it works are a pretty good dry rub for Spam.

These days, I can afford groceries as needed, which is a nice feeling. I can even afford to buy the odd thing at the Planet Organic, which is like the Canadian version of Whole Foods, so I have that going for me.

When you have no money, you have very few options available to you. The more you have, the more options you have in front of you. Similarly, when you have a higher work capacity, range of motion, absolute strength, or anaerobic threshold, you have more options as to stuff you can do. If you’re very deconditioned and unable to do stuff, your options are very limited.

#3. Competitiveness needs an outlet

There’s a reason things like Fantasy Football has become as popular as it is. It’s a similar reason as to why Crossfit has exploded in popularity in the past 5-10 years, and it has to do more with the inherent desire of some people to be competitive with others.

There are always groups of individuals who want to compete with each other. The end result of their competitiveness may or may not be productive or beneficial, but it’s something we all do to a point. I’m sure you can think of some element of your life where you compete against others in some form. Are you applying for a new job and have to interview for it? You’re competing. Looking to date someone? You’re competing. Want to boost sales to above a quota? You’re competing. We all do it. Sometimes the competition is one you are heavily invested in, and sometimes they’re the exact opposite of what would drive you. A lot of personal trainers view the sales element of the industry as too pushy, while others thrive on it.

The point is to find a way of pushing your competitive buttons, and go after it. Those are the kind of things that give you passion in your life, and bleeds over into other elements as well.

#4. You probably eat 80% of the same stuff each day, and have other routines

Breakfast = constant

Lunch = the same 2-3 options

Dinner = meat, veg, starch. Once a week eat out at a restaurant, maybe a new recipe

Snacks = favourite go-tos.

Sound familiar? You likely fall into this concept as well, with some wiggle room here and there, but most of the time people tend to go with the same foods on a regular or semi-regular basis. It’s not a problem unless you’re gaining weight or losing weight when you don’t want to do either, or when you get so bored with your food that you need a shake up.

You probably do the same thing with your workouts. If you run, it’s likely at or around the same speed. If you lift weights, you likely have a similar routine all the time, switched up whenever your coach decides it’s right to do so. If you coach yourself, that’s likely with each Olympics.

Routine isn’t a bad word. It’s how we limit the decisions we have to make in a day to only absolutely needed. Consistency is the goal of many diets and exercise programs, but that consistency can breed complacency, which is why shaking things up once in a while, like going on a vacation or trying a new restaurant or maybe taking an interest in a different form of training isn’t a bad idea once in a while. Constantly program hopping might not be the most desirable, but if you’re comfortable having no routine, it might be worth experimenting with it.

#5. There’s always a cost of doing business

It doesn’t matter what you do, there is always a cost and benefit. If you open a business, you have to pay taxes differently, hire an accountant, and get licenses and insurance. To get more business, you have to pay for marketing or renovations, or hire staff. No matter what, there’s always a cost associated with anything you do.

When you lift weights, you make your muscles stronger. There’s the potential for injury in the immediate, as well as the possibility of joint damage long term, but those risks are outweighed by the benefits of stronger muscles and improved bone density in most situations.

If you do high risk activities or exercise with too much load too frequently and don’t give yourself time or tools to help recover, the costs of those high risks tend to add up over time.

#6. Watch how successful people treat other people

You can get an idea of how people become successful by how the directly interact with other individuals and specifically with how they interact with people who they normally wouldn’t have time for.

A few years ago I had a chance to sit in on a training session where Joe DeFranco was training WWE pro wrestler and chief operating officer Triple H. Here’s a guy running the day to day operations of a billion dollar public company with a staff in the thousands, he’d just finished up a hellacious workout and promotional video shoot, and took the time to shake the hand of everyone in the room and ask their name.

You could say the same of people who run the company but still take time to talk to their custodial staff, listen to the concerns of their front line people, and even try to help a homeless person get a warm meal when they can. There’s a sense of humanity that tends to help success occur. Be more willing to help those who can’t help you, and make connections where others may not simply because you can.

#7. Early Kanye West was untouchable

This has nothing to do with a lesson learned. It’s just a fact of nature.

 

#8. Average is easy

It’s not much of an accomplishment to be the same as everyone else, especially when it comes to health, fitness, money, or anything else. If you want to be above average in any of these areas, you’ll have to work for it. Sometimes you’ll have to work really really hard. It’s worth the sacrifices and time in the end, but it still means you have to settle it in your head that you have to put out the effort to make yourself successful in something.

Ask anyone who has run a successful company, or even parents who were there for their kids and helped them be successful. They likely didn’t just clock a nine to five or tell their kids to simply figure it out on their own. They put in the work, did the time necessary to see progress, and didn’t take no for an answer.

#9. Schedule, have a plan, and stay on track

When I was in high school, I went to class, played on different sports teams, and worked part time to pay for shoes and gas for my car, plus all the other stuff dumb high school kids like to buy ($4000 sound system in a $50 car? How could I NOT get dates every weekend???).  In order to do all of this, I had to have a schedule to know when I was supposed to be where and what I was going to do when I was there. If I was out of town for a tournament, I had to let work know and catch up on homework.

When I was in university, I had to pick classes that would allow me to work towards finishing my degree, then work my part time job around that schedule so I could afford to pay to live while attending class. I took full courseloads, and in a science-heavy curriculum that also meant including labs and all the work that went with those. Balancing studying, assignments, lab work, actual work, and the occasional workout in there meant knowing when to work on one project and when to shut it down before starting on the next one.

After graduating, I had to schedule clients in to my day and throughout the week, keep them on plan, and ensure I had time set aside for writing programs, reading, and getting in my own workouts. See a trend?

Your workouts should be no different. Have a plan, including what days and times you’re going to get them in, what you’ll be working on, and how and when you should be moving on to something else. Trust the process and stay the course.

#10. There’s always a reason. You might just not have the tools to know what it is

When I used to work on my car in the garage, I’d have a problem to solve and a series of tests to determine what the problem was. If the engine wasn’t turning on, you’d check the battery to see if there was a charge, check the starter to see if it was working properly or receiving power, check the alternator, and so on and so on. Eventually I’d get to the root of the problem, figure out what to do to fix it, and try the engine again. It would work and I’d be happy, or it wouldn’t and I’d run through the series again and see what else it might be.

Occasionally something would come up where I wouldn’t have the tools in the garage to fix what I was working on. Maybe the wheels needed balancing, or something like that where the hobbyist in their garage wouldn’t realistically have the tool to balance the rims. I’d have to bring the car to someone who had the tools to do the job.

Knowing when to refer out and what I didn’t have the tools to work with helped me to become a better trainer. If you have an injury that isn’t getting better, go see a physical therapist, chiropractor, witch doctor, or whoever would have the tools to help you out.

#11. It’s hard to be pessimistic. It’s easier to be optimistic

Some people are worriers who see the potential downfalls to everything in life. This is actually quite an important skillset as they are pretty much prepared for any and every potential outcome in a situation and are likely to have a plan, no matter what happens. People who tend to have no thought that anything other than their preconceived outcomes will happen are usually left a little lost when something does eventually go wrong.

I’m usually the eternal optimist. I try to always find the silver lining, and try to help my clients see it too, especially when they’re getting down on themselves. My wife tends to worry about things, which helps me out to see things from a different perspective and plan for potential problems before they happen, even if they don’t. Having the best of both worlds at your disposal is an awesome combination to have, as long as the pessimist doesn’t drag down the optimist, and as long as the optimist doesn’t annoy the living hell out of the pessimist.

#12. Build bridges, not walls

I’ve had more than a few times in my life where I’ve had to work with people I just didn’t get along with. Every fiber of their being rubbed me the wrong way. One thing I’ve found to be helpful with these kinds of people is to simply get to know them better and meet them on their terms. Instead of focusing on the undesirable traits they had, I would focus on some of the deeper elements of them personally and come to an understanding of what they were all about versus pushing them away and viewing them with distain.

This became a valuable skill while working as a personal trainer. Finding out key information about a person, what drives them, what their other interests are, and what made them happy helped me make a better connection with them, and eventually forma better quality relationship with them. This has also helped with some online conversations I’ve had where either I disagreed with someone or they didn’t like what I was saying. Meeting them halfway and trying to see their point of view based on their world experiences versus just viewing them as wrong and trying to “win” helped me to make new connections and probably ease some tensions about a dialogue, maybe even make a new friend.

 

Well, that’s it for today. Tune in next day for part 2.